Walking tall despite difficulty

Every Sunday I take a morning walk around the neighbourhood. This exercise is always accomplished in the company of our helper. We set out with the necessary accessories; my walking frame and sports sandals. I said sports sandals instead of sports shoes because I have difficulty wearing shoes on my right foot.

We start by negotiating the drain and the cemented rough patch in front of our house. Then I need to use all my strength to haul up and balance my entire body on the road which is on a higher surface.

Holding on to the walker I make a 90 degree turn carefully in the direction of our journey. We begin our morning walk from that point. Throughout our walk I have the opportunity to observe and meet up with various people who are living in the neighbourhood. Just to quote a few;

There is this guy who walks his dog and stops to wish ‘good morning’ and commented about the weather. Then there is this very nice couple who walk after walking their dogs, sometimes the husband will tend to the garden while the wife continue walking.

Also there is this kind old lady in her seventies who always gives encouraging words. Although this grandma visits other children outside of town, she prefers living in this area with her unmarried sons where she has been living for the past fifty years. We meet and chat every Sunday morning while she waits for the dobby.

Then there is this retired nurse in her sixties who lives alone in the double storey house. The nephew who used to live with her has succumbed to brain tumour last year. This lady has even offered to massage my lower limbs to improve blood circulation. Then there is this grandpa who will wish good morning and god bless you.

Almost all these people asked similar question when we met for the first time. Their queries naturally surround the events which led to my disability.

They would ask;

What happen to you?

Did you fell and injured your leg?

Did you have a stroke?

My answer;

No, I am a brain tumour survivor. A kind of growth in the brain.

Their response;

Oh dear. Did you have an operation? How long ago? How come the brain affects your leg?

My response;

Yes I underwent operation about ten years ago. Our brain have a lot of nerves it’s just like a CPU to a computer, if something goes haywire in the CPU, the computer will not function correctly, same thing here, if there is a damage in the brain certain parts of the body will not work properly.

Their response;

Are you still on medication? What did the doctor said? Will you recover?

My response;

Yes, I am on certain types of medication. The doctor says something about scar tissue pressing on the nerves. Nobody can say for sure if I would recover to my previous form but the doctor said physical therapy would help, and here I am working very hard at it.

The answer to their last question normally brought some regret to their faces. Some of them express relief (maybe because I am still alive), others said I was lucky to have come through the illness in with only my mobility affected, and point out that they have heard about patients losing their eye sight, hearing, memory, senses and even lives. There are yet others who offered encouraging words and good wishes. However there is this particular guy, who responded in his unique way, he said something like: (Aiyo! But if you could not recover, you will spend the rest of your life with this disability. So pitiful lah). At the moment I thought to myself: Am I giving this gentleman a pitiful impression?

I think pitiful or not, the particular person with disability has the last word and is not for others to judge. We may have limitations in our daily lives but we try to overcome or work around these obstacles. Sooner or later we will find our own ways to adapt to our new lifestyle. After that before you know it we are adapting very well and enjoying our new lifestyles. For me it is a repetitive process of adapting, trying, falling, adapting, trying, falling and getting up and trying to adapt to the environment. For some persons with disability they just make the best out of their circumstances trying to reach for the sky. For others they just want healthy, peaceful, relax and comfortable environment. For example the participants in Paralympics Games tried their best to be the fittest, the strongest and the fastest in their respective competition. On the other hand not all people with disability wish to take part in the Paralympics.